Word: thet
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Dates: during 1937-1937
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...mighty fine o' yer ter let yer readers know about our "Former Apple Butter Stirrers' Society Fer The Purpose Of Promulgatin, Promotin and Perpetuatin Memories Of Apple Butter Stirrin Days." And th' former apple butter stirrers thet's rote in 're mighty grateful...
Course nearly all o' us wood trade our false teeth an hot water bottles fer some o' th' good old apple butter agin. An if yer kin find some feller thet'll guarantee ter make as good apple butter as we use ter stir, all he's got ter do is tell us about it in TIME (an he woodn't need a big ad), and his fortune's made. Fer most all o' us wood be reglar customers...
...figgerin on collectin no dues nor fees fer joinin. Course I know thet's gonna make some of them perfessional organizers mad. But ter keep things even, I ain't gonna make no promises neither. Fer the truth is, all the politicians and perfessional organizers has already used up all the good promises; and no former apple butter stirrers would be satisfied with enny second-rate promises...
...decided whether ter make it a stag affair or not. I ain't talked thet part over with my wife yet. But the chances is it won't be stag. (I went to one of them stag affairs at one of the clubs in our town one night and my wife heard about it. Since thet time she ain't had no use fer stags or ennything thet'd make yer stagger...
Ennyway, if they's enny TIME readers thet want ter join my "Former Apple Butter Stirrers' Society Per The Purpose of Promulgatin, Promotin and Perpetuatin Memories of Apple Butter Stirrin Days" jest tell 'em ter write me at No. 318 S. State Street, Marion, Ohio, and I'll see thet they get the proper identifyin kredentials-without spendin a penny or agreein ter nothin...