Word: stuker
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...airline, however, will list some of its perks: being the first to board a plane; having a private check-in room with a back door to the front of security; a private phone number to agents who are at your beck and call. United's top flier, Thomas Stuker, is a huge fan. "Global services is like dying and going to heaven," he says. "They take care of every single Global person 24/7...
...Stuker talks in giddy tones about special operators working behind the scenes to correct missed connections even while Global passengers are still in the air. "When I call the 800 number in Michigan, most of the time I don't even have to introduce myself, they know me," says Stuker. "I got my own 1-800 KISS MY ASS hotline...
Over the years, Stuker has enjoyed many Bingham-esque moments of grandeur, including $500 of free wine one Christmas and, another time, a gourmet dinner at Chicago's Tru for two ("They even let me pick the wine, which they might not do again."). He even had a United-sponsored appearance as a diner on Seinfeld ("I just sat there; they didn't want me to talk"). Last week on his way back from Australia, flight officials boarded his plane in Los Angeles and brought on a birthday cake...
...Stuker, 56, a sales and management trainer for the auto industry, is a purist and says his "butt-in-seat" flights only amount to 8.8 million since he started in 1982. (Counting all miles from flight bonuses and credit card extras, the total is an astronomical 30 million miles.) He says he's still gunning for a pure 10 million of miles his butt has actually flown...
...When Stuker gets there, he says, he'll do it in style. "It won't be on a flight to Des Moines or Omaha, I'll take a bus before I cross the mark on one of those flights. It's going to be an international flight, probably Europe with my girlfriend. I'm going to plot it out exactly and know when I hit it. And hell yeah, there is going to be champagne...