Word: joumana
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...Once she even pronounced "steak" to rhyme with "leak." Years earlier, in a snooty French eatery, her husband had expressed embarrassment over her pronunciation of huitres, and she was still getting him back. I thought about that couple as I took in this week's news of Jason and Joumana Kidd. The former, a pro basketball star, had filed for divorce, contending, as the New York Daily News put it, that "his wife resorted to punching, kicking and throwing 'nearby household objects' to resolve marital disputes." Her lawyer pooh-poohed this claim, and mentioned that Jason, to quote the Daily...
...Possibly the French fries masked some deeper issue. Asked whether Jason was unfaithful, Joumana's lawyer said, "Do they sell pantyhose at Macy's?" That's a new one to me. I like it better than "Does a bear go poop in the woods?" It's edgier, more urban...
...Speaking of figures of speech, the New York Post quoted Joumana as saying, "Home is where we lay our hat." Maybe it wasn't nearby-object-throwing or even infidelity that undermined that marriage, so much as her tendency to get expressions slightly wrong. And he can't refrain from snapping at her: "The expression, damn it, is 'Home is where I hang my hat'!" And she comes back with "Lay our hat! Lay our hat! Lay our hat!" Not the sort of thing you'd put into court papers, so we may never know...
Like many banished to New Jersey, Kidd didn't arrive a hero. He left the Phoenix Suns in part because the likable guy blew it big time when he punched his wife Joumana in the face in front of their son T.J. in January 2001. The couple, who remain together, say it was a one-time event. But Joumana's 911 call, which led to his arrest, told a different story: "This is minor compared to what I usually go through," she said. Kidd took four games off to deal with his family and then wrote a letter of apology...
...punished him in the way that must have hurt him most: he was no longer well liked. Phoenix fans were glad to see him go. And in the play-offs, he became a target of Boston rooters' chants of "wife beater." It got so bad in Game 4 that Joumana and T.J. decided to stay in New Jersey for Game...