Word: grader
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...right, of course, about the third alternative, and a very sensible one it is--working out some system of fooling the grader; although I think I should prefer the word "impressing." We admit to being impressionable, but not hypercredulous simps. His first two tactics for system-beating, his Vague Generalities and Artful Equivocations, seem to presume the latter, and are only going to convince CRIMSON-reading graders (there are a few, and we tell our friends) that the time has come to tighten the screws just a bit more...
Think, Mr. Carswell (wherever you are), think, all of you: imagine the situation of your grader. (Unless, of course, he is of the Wheatstone Bridge-double differential-CH3C6H2(NO2)3-set. These people are mere cogs, automata; they simply feel to make sure you've punched the right holes. As they cannot think, they cannot be impressed; they are clods. The only way to beat their system is to cheat.) In the humanities and social sciences, it is well to remember, there is a man (occasionally a woman), a human type filling out your picture postcards. What does he want...
Carswell's further discussion of the O.A. is quite to the point--he himself realizes its superiority to any E., however A. His illustration includes one of the key "Wake Up the Grader" phrases--"It is absurd." What force! What gall! What fun! "Ridiculous," "hopeless," "nonsense," on the one hand; "doubtless," "obvious," "unquestionable" on the other, will have the same effect. A hint of nostalgic, anti-academic languor at this stage as well may well match the grader's own mood: "It seems more than obvious to one entangled in the petty quibbles of contemporary Medievalists--at times indeed, approaching...
...above all, keep us entertained, keep us awake. Be bold, be personal, be witty, be chock-full-of-facts. I'm sure you can do it without studying if you try. We did. Best wishes, A GRADER...
...this point our assumption expert proceeds to discuss anything which strikes his fancy at the moment. If he can sneak the first assumption past the grader, then the rest is clear sailing. If he fails, he still gets a certain amount of credit for his irrelevant but fact-filled discussion of scientific progress in the 18th century. And it is amazing what some graders will swallow in the name of intellectual freedom...