Word: armpit
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Dates: during 2000-2000
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...angry alien. I decided it was best to call. After I listened to some Goulet tunes while on hold, Goulet picked up, talking loudly and frequently calling me "the kid." Our relationship flourished over the next year, with letters, free Goulet CDs and voice-mail critiques of my columns: "Armpit smelling? There's something wrong with you, kid." Last month I called to tell him I was coming to Vegas, and he invited me to dinner and drinks at the maison de Goulet. After passing the guard at his gated community, I had trouble locating his house, until I spotted...
...www.russellcrowe.com. The site for the coolest guy alive is still under construction but there are some nifty pictures of his torn rotator cuff under a surgeon's knife. We even get Crowe's wicked commentary on the arthroscopic procedure: "Vivid memory of shaving of armpit, request by four hospital staff to strip naked and put on paper pants. Impolitely declined-basis of my argument, 'it's my fucking shoulder...
...year-old guys in skirts from West L.A. who called themselves the Staggering Libido Sisters and at a prior Burning Man ran a tent called the Pamela Anderson Lee Celebrity Badminton Tournament and Glamour Workshop. It wasn't until I allowed them to take a picture of my armpit and felt Carmen Libido raise my arm, inhale and shout "A+!!" that my gaydar blipped. When Shaboom Libido started videotaping and said, "This is Joel, our straight man, whom we are going to convert or at least use before this weekend is over," I realized these guys were gayer than...
...wasn't going to let a little man love stop me from becoming a joiner. In half an hour I had snapped 28 armpit Polaroids for their bulletin board, including a woman whose claim that her armpits smelled like vegetable curry was confirmed by Carmen. Then he turned to me and said, "I was just supporting her reality." These guys knew from cult running...
...make sure each morning to layer the deodorant on because you know that there will be the short people on the train that will be forced, like it or not, to smell your armpit. You hope to God that it lasts all day and through the ride home. If it doesn't, you hope to God that they don't blame you for it, even though you know that there really isn't anything...