Word: tragically
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Take, for example, my favorite article in the parody, a feature on the people of Three Mile Island, Pennsylvania, whose children have been turned into household appliances by radiation. The tone is perfect--genuine concern for the tragic victims, yet with a sense that everything will turn out all right in the end. The relentless good cheer comes through mostly in the writing. Snappy puns and appealing alliteration make everything seem a little less gloomy. To wit: "Some people, however, are wearing their nuclear designer genes with a smile...(or)...the problem has the Middletown populace as irritated as they...
...journey for a man who had spent eleven years as a correspondent in Egypt and dozens of hours in intimate talk with its slain leader. It was one of many dramatic experiences of TIME staffers around the world who helped report this week's cover package on the tragic events in Cairo...
...Reagan received his first detailed briefing from National Security Adviser Richard Allen. As Allen described the attack, Reagan mumbled repeatedly, "Good Lord, good Lord." At 11:15 a.m. the White House Situation Room confirmed that Sadat was dead. On Capitol Hill, Vice President George Bush was informed of the tragic news in a phone call from his chief of staff. Bush promptly relayed word to Senate Majority Leader Howard Baker, who announced Sadat's passing to the Senate. The White House, however, quickly disowned the statement and refused to confirm or deny the Egyptian leader's death until Cairo...
Each side claimed that the tragic events in Egypt last week made its case more compelling. Opponents of the Reagan Administration's plan to sell five AWACS surveillance planes to Saudi Arabia argued that the murder of President Sadat illustrated the folly of selling some of America's most advanced weapons technology to potentially unstable Middle Eastern regimes. Proponents answered just as vigorously that Sadat's death underscored America's need to support its few remaining allies in the area. Both arguments swirled in and around the Senate, where the Foreign Relations Committee is scheduled...
...several premises. The first, that no internal resistance movement seriously threatens the stability of the South African regime, is probably a fair assessment. No ideology of mass violence has ever captured the spirit of the Black South Africans; uprisings such as the Soweto riots of 1976 have generally been tragic, isolated incidents. Journalists in that country also report that resistance efforts such as the African National Congress have lost much of their past potency. Only time can prove the merit of the judgment, but armed insurrection in the near future seems unlikely...