Word: shriner
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...think things could have gone any better," said Shriner Michael Andrews. "Everyone was as hospitable as they could...
...only by the comforts of the cars but by their sheer tonnage as well. The organization man of the 1950s might have been satisfied with a workadaddy DeSoto; in the 1970s the aspiring hipster could relieve his mid-life crisis with an Italian sports car the size of a Shriner go-cart. Affluent Americans of the 1990s--so responsible at home, so productive in the workplace--want a car designed for war. With its four-wheel drive and tons of torque and booster-rocket horsepower, today's sports-utility vehicle would have come in handy at the Battle...
...Like a Shriner with a water pistol? Something like that. Even writers have to get out of the house once in a while. The last time Updike cut loose abroad was about 15 years ago, when he used an African setting for The Coup. Now he retells the Tristan and Isolde legend as a love story about a black teenage mugger from the hillside slums of Rio and an upper-class white girl with a hunger for forbidden experience...
...first type of professor I've suffered under is The Hollow Man. Before I took his course, I had heard that this man was "the world's greatest living authority on Shriner poetry," and I was therefore expecting...
After a good five minutes spent wrestling with a microphone and clearing his throat, he shattered my hope that appearances can be deceiving: "Hmmmmnughagggh...In the course of 20th century...uhm...literature, the contribution of the...uhm...Shriner poets should not be...uhm...overlooked...uhm..." As he continued, droning on endlessly in the same monotone, I began to feel that another voice was speaking through him, perhaps that of a long-deceased carrot...