Word: inquisitor
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...having a 15-page paper due the next. I wasn't allowed to know who my examiners were until I arrived at the Hist and Lit office, hair still drying, coat slightly rumpled. Then it was confided to me in a stage whisper that I had drawn "The Inquisitor" (not his real name), one of the most well-read professors, and "The Executioner" (should be her real name), one of the most despised cold-fish history grad students. I had four minutes to compose myself. I considered swallowing a bottle of pills and then dying at their feet...
...Inquisitor walked me up to the stone wall. "I see your thesis is on popular literature. Have you studied popular literature of the 18th century...
...meant on your own, "the Inquisitor said, obviously disappointed that I hadn't spent all my spare nights paging through yellow pamphlets in Widener's dustiest recesses. Since he hadn't read my thesis, he turned to my bibliography page, and said, "There are a lot of names here I expect, and then, there are a lot of others missing." He began to tell me whom I should have used. I said that I felt my interpretations of the books and films were just as valid as the people he was naming, and that I couldn't read everything-especially...
...into coffin: after discussing the reforms of the 1800's, I mentioned that the women's and anti-slavery groups felt similar needs. The Executioner's eyes lit up like an electric chair "Can you think of a specific instance when the two were linked?" I shrugged helplessly. The Inquisitor interrupted, asking her, "Now, was the connection actually made at Seneca Falls?" She replied something like, "Well, not in the platform, but in the speeches made outside." She then turned to me an asked to name the women who had made this link. I shook my head. She told...
...Grand Inquisitor...