Word: haplessness
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...first-class, second-string Quarterback Gary Cuozzo. Baltimore, which finished a strong second in the N.F.L.'s Eastern division last year, happily grabbed Bubba Smith, Michigan State's mammoth (6 ft. 7 in., 285 Ibs.) defensive end who responds to chants of "Kill Bubba, kill." The hapless New York Giants (1-12-1) were supposed to be No. 2 in line. But the Giants had already traded their position-plus a lot more-to the Minnesota Vikings for Quarterback Fran Tarkenton (TIME, March 17), and the Vikings lost no time hauling in Bubba's All-America teammate...
...Good Man, Charlie Brown. The U.S. comic strip has often mimicked and miniaturized the battle of the sexes. In Bringing Up Father, the explosively frustrated, cigar-chewing Jiggs is tamed by the shrew Maggie. In Blondie, the hapless, incompetent Dagwood is forever being put to rights by his cool, frizzy-haired wife. In Peanuts, Charles M. Schulz defined and some what disguised the process by finally reducing the American male to his supposedly intrinsic childishness...
...Then began the long parade: short runs with a vast assortment of lovers, longer runs and growing fame on the stage. She was the queen in Victor Hugo's Ruy Bias, Phèdre in Racine's classic, and she donned trousers as Napoleon's hapless son, the Duc de Reichstadt, in Edmond Rostand's L'Aiglon. Kings mooned over her, and audiences wept torrents over her magnificent death scenes...
...profane and human phenomena. Education, for example, was once considered an exclusively religious responsibility, and in the Middle Ages, the state was thought to be subject to the church. The deeper meaning of secularization is the transformation of man's relationship to the universe from that of a hapless prisoner of cosmic fate to that of free, responsible custodian of the world and everything...
...inch shorter and 20 Ibs. lighter-but they also agree that "no college quarterback can play first string unless he gets with some club that is in last place or so." Which is exactly where Spurrier seems to be headed-for the National Football League's hapless New York Giants, who have won only one game while losing nine so far this year...