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...been talking some shit Boggle-wise. Let me just say that I’m not a betting man, but the odds are good that you, “Matt Sussman” (if that is his real name) and whatever other monosyllabic punks you drag into this FM-Arts smackdown will be weeping in pain and contrition before that three-minute glass is even halfway down. This will be a relentless vocabulatory pounding that could only be surpassed by William Safire playing George W. Bush at Scrabble. Christine Yokoyama is a 100-pound ball of four-, five...
Sadly, at last Thursday’s Boggle tournament, flyweight Boggle heavyweight Christine C. Yokoyama ’04 was unable to bring the FM team to victory. FM faced handicaps from the start, namely intoxication from consumption of dangerously fluorescent wine coolers and the conspicuous absence of Gossip Gizzuy and his two points’ worth of gratuitous letters. But the FM team did not go gentle into the good nizzight: Aforementioned trash-talker Benjamin D. Mathis-Lilley ’03 fought the good fight, asking if S-E-I-N-E was a word, or just...
...scored 18 points in one round alone, while Arts Chair-elect Jacob H. Russell ’05 proudly announced that he was the only one who found P-E-N-I-S. For the sake of numerical balance, the Arts team was joined by FM Associate and Crimson President-elect Amit R. Paley ’04. Paley became incredibly involved in the game, leaning over the board until his leopard-skin boxer shorts were visible. In a later CNN interview, Paley admitted that they were a gift from his mother, and noted that you can?...
Despite Mathis-Lilley’s earlier assurances that Arts’ scores would “be like a drop in the ocean, an angry FM ocean that forms into a giant tidal wave of words crushing the Arts section like the tidal wave crushed New York City in the 1998 movie Deep Impact,” he was wrong. So very wrong...
...list in this issue of FM has become known as the “15 Most Interesting Seniors,” but—for the last three years, at least—we’ve never made that claim. These are merely 15 seniors chosen by an undemocratic and arbitrary process whose only goal is to find people with a diversity of interests who will make good dinner guests. Standing together in the hallway of The Crimson, waiting to have their profile pictures taken before heading off to Rock Bottom, we were relieved to see that our choices...