Word: faked
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...Yale Daily News published a fake issue of The Harvard Crimson yesterday announcing the return of Henry A. Kissinger '50 to his University teaching duties...
...easy from Boston or New York, getting off at Princeton Junction and taking the PJ&B (Princeton Junction & Back) car the short distance to the University. Either way you go it's mandatory to find some friends at lunchtime who have a station wagon-preferably the kind with the fake wood paneling-and a tailgate...
...using them to represent all forms of societal and psychological troubles in the world today. Sickle-cell anemia apparently can't be mentioned without bringing in miscegenation, heroin addiction, and the ghetto experience. Twin "babies" age twenty-eight, spell double-trouble night down the line: homosexuality, incest, fake suicides and "dressing up" together; they put the Bobbseys to shame...
...Henry Kissinger centerfold seems to be one of the most popular parts of the magazine. Freshmen women in the Yard are posting it on their walls, and most people who buy the parody like it. But Lampoon president S. Eric Rayman '73 freely admits that the thing is a fake. It is apparently a 50-year-old cab driver whose belly is beginning to sag a bit, with Kissinger's head attached to it. No doubt that is what a lot of people, including the Lampoon, would like to think Kissinger looks like...
...final Army gift was given with only two minutes to go in the game. The Cadets, at this time attempting anything to avoid the impending shutout, called for a fake-punt-pass. Predictably though, the passer was sacked on his own four yard line. The Sooners poured final salt in Army's wounds by bolting runner Doug Quincy in for another easy Harvard score three plays later...