Word: explainers
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Dates: during 2000-2000
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...Alamos engineer. But there was rubble everywhere you looked. Energy Secretary Bill Richardson, whose department had ignored security lapses at Los Alamos for years, was walking around in a daze. Rescue workers were still searching for Attorney General Janet Reno and her deputy, Eric Holder, who were trying to explain why they had suddenly agreed to drop 58 of 59 charges against a man once accused of stealing the "crown jewels" of America's nuclear arsenal. When master survivalist Bill Clinton came out of hiding, it was to confide to reporters that he had "always had reservations" about some aspects...
...though the neighbors in White Rock, N.M., just down the road from Los Alamos, put out flags last Wednesday and welcomed Lee home with a big backyard party on Barcelona Avenue, the man at the center of the wreckage still has a lot of explaining to do. Lee won back his freedom only after pleading guilty to a single felony count of mishandling national-defense information, which means he downloaded the equivalent of 400,000 pages of classified data about the U.S. nuclear-weapons program onto an unsecured computer system and then transferred them to high-volume cassettes...
...thing if you live in the Quad and never make it home. But it still doesn't explain why you can't remember to turn the phone off--even if your significant other needs his or her regular check-ins. And for those TFs who've let their phones ring in section, it doesn't make you seem cool or important, just incompetent. So please: save our sanity and your Geiger counts--cancer's no fun. Just switch off before you enter our hallowed halls of learning. And it wouldn't hurt to do the same in dining halls...
...wounded cow) either go on too long or feel like the Farrellys attempting to hurdle the ever-rising gross-out bar. As Carrey's schizophrenic state trooper hits the road with Renee Zellweger, the movie gets wrapped up in a nonsensical plot that no one can seem to fully explain to me - the screenplay was reportedly kicking around Hollywood for a decade, and it sure feels like it. It's unfortunate, because Jim Carrey ultimately gives one of his most inspired physical performances - by the time his split personalities began vying for control, we know he's hitting...
...Lampoon product would be complete without a mention of Thomas Pynchon, and the Guide to College Admissions obliges (see p. 148, and maybe others that I missed). The Lampoon's collective obsession with Pynchon is bizarre, and probably beyond my ability to explain. Pynchon the novelist is inaccessible, just like the 'Poon. Very few people make it all the way through his books, just like very few people can read an entire issue of the Lampoon. And people who do read Pynchon get to feel like they're part of a special intellectual club - just like the Lampoon thinks...