Word: dates
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Dates: during 1990-1999
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FIRST, Harvard could change the date of Commencement from Thursday to Friday, Saturday or even Sunday. Certainly this proposal flies in the face of years of tradition. But the value of archaic tradition pales before the value of making Harvard accessible to students of all socio-economic backgrounds...
University administrators will probably happily announce their willingness to speak with students about changing the date of Commencement, and they will expect students to devote their time to forming committees, taking surveys and attending meetings--and nothing will come of it. This is unreasonable. The administration should take the initiative and change the date of Commencement...
...suggesting that we abolish spring formals. All you hand-fondling, back-massaging, emotionally adjusted gaze-into-each-other's-eyes couples--please, go spend lots of money and dance to music I can't comprehend. But please don't invite me when you know I can't get a date and then act surprised when you find out that I already know what courses I'm taking next fall...
...last, I found a date...
...Harvard beats Yale, the two schools would be co-champs of the toughest conference in Division I tax. The Crimson, rather than the Bulldogs, would probably be the idle team on May 16--the opening date of the NCAA tourney...