Word: squirrels
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Dates: during 1950-1959
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Cried Neuberger: "The President of the U.S., according to news dispatches, is having the White House squirrels caught in box traps and carted many miles away from the White House because they have been scratching his putting green. I strenuously protest this undertaking. I urge the President of the U.S. to cease and desist before he does permanent and irreparable damage to an American tradition." Squirrel in Hand. Neuberger was briefly interrupted by Kentucky's Democratic Senator Alben Barkley, a veteran performer. Asked Barkley: "Would it be inappropriate here to paraphrase a quotation from the Bible, 'Foxes have...
...results of Neuberger's speech were eminently satisfying: he posed for newspaper photographers with a squirrel nibbling on a nut in his hand; he was carefully questioned on television about his crusade for the squirrels...
Various theories may explain the squirrel's mysterious death. A possible underlying cause was the severe winter which limited the peanut-throwing tourist trade. A variation of the nut theory insists that freshmen were feeding salted peanuts to number four, who then became overweight and fell victim to heart disease...
...cruel chopper and rain theories are other possibilities. The former blames tree "trimmings" for leaving the squirrel without home and food caches. Possibly number four had to climb to such heights before reaching a branch that he died of over-exertion. Equally fatal is the rain theory, which visualizes the creature scampering innocently across the Yard, then sinking into the mud with only a brown bubble for a headstone...
Regardless of its cause, this untimely death is noted and mourned. Yet a new and graver problem confronts these gray sprites. Unless there is soon a fourth squirrel to pair off the trio, only two will survive the spring...